I admit it, I'm in a pretty good place right now. But with the holiday's approaching, there are a few...annoyances. So to honor the age old (ok, generation old) tradition of airing of grievances in honor of Festivus, here we go.
Single People Get Screwed
And not in a good way. When it comes to buying gifts, single people get screwed. When you're a couple, you can get away with the gift being from both of you. Nevermind the fact that, especially when there is a set dollar amount for the gift exchange, the couple ends up spending half as much as the single person. The couple collectively buys one gift, while the single person buys each person a gift, thus, spending twice the money. How can this possibly be a financially sound decision? The single person, often making less money than the couple does combined, is responsible for twice the amount, and thus twice the money of the couple. And when the couple has kids...all bets are off. You spend money on presents for the couple, still. And then you have to spoil the kid(s) too. We single people totally get screwed.
When Do I Get To Make Plans?
I had a great idea for Christmas this year. We only get custody of my brother and sis-in-law and my niece every other year for Christmas. So we had them for Thanksgiving this year. And this will likely (hopefully) be my last Christmas in DC. So let's do Christmas here. Then I ended up moving to a much smaller apartment, so my mom used that to convince everyone to go to Florida instead. Which is fine, and at the moment, leaving the 25 degree weather that DC currently is suffering from for 75 degrees and sun sounds quite nice at the moment.
What I was really hoping for was a nice, relaxing vacation. And I get more family than I was really asking for, and I get no opportunity to make plans. At all. I was hoping for Christmas Eve to be a time to invite people that are likely going to be spending Christmas with their own families, but still people whose company we enjoy.
Long story short, that's now how it's shaping up. Instead of getting to invite people I want to invite, make food I want to make, it has turned into 18 phone calls in one day between my mom and her cousins with statements like "well, we can't do this because one of the cousins doesn't like to be around people she doesn't know, and won't talk to anyone" and "they're just going to do their own thing instead, but we still need to make considerations for them." Annoying. All of it.
Ok, I admit that it isn't just the single people that have to deal with family crap during the holiday's. The big difference is that as a single person you get one vote. And even then, it's not a real vote because you're destined to just do what the majority wants to do anyway. Because the alternative is sitting in your efficiency apartment eating take-out Chinese food on Christmas. Actually, at the moment, that doesn't sound half bad.
It doesn't help that my dad made a sarcastic, off handed comment last night when they finally got around to cluing me into the discussions. I asked when I would be able to provide input for the holidays, or plan an evening like Christmas Eve, or even host it. He said "in 8 years." Which is my off hand, non-responsive answer to when I'm getting married. Where is it written that you have to be married to be able to host something like Christmas Eve. Or even get the consideration that this might be a possibility. I know he was joking. I get that, but it was a poorly timed joke, and the meaning behind it, serious or not, doesn't help me like the holiday's any better.
How To Survive
I have decided that there is only one way for me to be able to survive the holiday's. Remain in a constant state of buzzed. And since my parents are teetotalers, and against drinking in general, I'm going to have to sneak in the booze. Yup, I'm 30, and I'm going to have to sneak in a flask. It's a sad day, but I believe it's necessary.
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